Chapters
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Sweet Sauce could hardly believe his luck.With barely any work on his part, other than attending a social function he had planned on going to anyway—Sweet Sauce had achieved far more than he could've done simply by stealing a train ticket. After all, just arriving in the city would be the first step. He wouldn't know the location, and the closer he got to the princess the more resistance would rise up in his path. A random foal would not be allowed anywhere near her, even if it was just long enough to…-
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The worst part for Sweet Sauce wasn't living with an earth pony. If anything, Octavia did a far better job matching his expectations for decorum. Living with her was a great deal like growing up in the Castle of the Two Sisters—it meant politeness, but also an uncompromising obedience to the rules. So long as Sweet made it to class on time, and got his homework done, the rest was up to him.No, the worst part of Sweet's new life in Equestria was what didn't happen. The new princess knew what he was, knew…
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There was nothing particularly dignified about being walked home by a princess. Twilight Sparkle made polite conversation the rest of the way back, her tone so aggressively boring that not even a cart full of nitroglycerin would've been agitated by it. Everyone who saw them turned to stare, looking from him to the Alicorn and back again.It didn't matter if they didn't say anything. He could see the suspicion, and could imagine the whispers even if they weren't out loud.Thankfully the indignity went only so…
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Sweet Sauce made it through one day of pony school.Barely.More than once he found himself wondering if it would've been kinder just to opt for execution. At least that way he wouldn't have been suffering through agonizing, time-wasting hours.Of course there was nothing new in the fundamentals. Language had changed some of its conventions since he left, but not by much. He could still work with figures, and blasted through every level of student evaluation.That didn’t mean there weren't big holes, though.…
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Sweet Sauce was barely even aware of the next few hours—the entire next day, really. Expending additional effort unnecessarily was his least favorite thing. On the other hand, letting other ponies believe things about him that weren't true was a state that was all too easy to settle into. The mares were well-meaning, but not terribly inquisitive.They wanted him to drop his strange admission, and not hold them to their promise of helping him. So let them think that he'd been convinced. Of course, it was…
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Sweet Sauce took a few moments to recover from the explosion of sonic force. He stumbled backward, legs flung wildly in all directions. Eventually he found purchase on a nearby couch, and finally collected his wits. For once the sturdiness of these useless mudpony bodies actually amounted to something—a pegasus might've been rendered instantly unconscious upon impact. His ears rang, sound returning only after a few seconds. And when he heard it...It wasn't some incredibly overpowered music box, playing…
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Sweet Sauce knew he was brilliant. In terms of ponies who had ever lived, he would've placed himself in at least the top ten, maybe even lower than that. It wasn't his fault that so many other creatures just couldn't see past the tip of their own noses. Equestria didn't really need a constant supply of true genius. Just a few individuals like him were enough, to protect the country from danger and to occasionally intervene when ponies needed saving from themselves.Even knowing and accepting his genius,…
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Sweet Sauce didn't have very long to wait for the family-to-be to arrive in the office. Minutes really, and the door rang with the sound of their arrival.He hadn't left the downstairs office—it wasn't like there was anything waiting for him anywhere else. He needed to judge these ponies, see which one would be most likely to be sympathetic. Or gullible.They looked much as they did in the photograph—a white mare with a crisp blue mane and a pair of deep red glasses on her head. A proper unicorn too,…
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Honeydew stared back at Sweet Sauce, her expression so utterly flabbergasted that he almost started laughing all over again. She braced herself against the couch with one hoof, and used the delay to take a few long, slow breaths. Finally she glanced down at her pad, and began scribbling with her mouth.She didn't reply, and he would've thought she hadn't even heard him, except for how vigorously she looked down at her writing, then back at him.Good. She better get that all written down, so my demands can be…
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Sweet Sauce had little reason to be impressed with a teleportation spell, even one cast without preparation on an entire group to travel several miles at once.Okay, maybe he was a little impressed. They reappeared in Ponyville without blowing out his ears with displacement, or freezing the ground with the sudden shift in temperature. But part of that might just be the change from what he was used to, after living in a world where being able to read a bus schedule meant greater than average competence.He…
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